just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
