Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
be right there i have to get my cape
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
