from now on my penis is your penis
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
All I want is dick and wine.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
