I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
