Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
