sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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