Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
