you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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