508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
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