So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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