It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
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