i jhust puked up my retainher.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
