what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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