Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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