I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize