I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
