i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
