Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
40s are totally the cure
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
