the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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