Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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