you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
