we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
