dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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