OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
