Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
