for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I have already put on my inside pants.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
