bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
