She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
