STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Randomize
