ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
