The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
