official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
