She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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