My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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