Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
