you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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