I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
