It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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