I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
