The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
