Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
The Olympian is in my bed
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
