Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
