doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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