I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I'm like, not good at living.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
