He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
