i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
