I think I just saw someone hide a body.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
