Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
