I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize