Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
