I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
my shit smells like andre
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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