We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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