Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
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