You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
